Don't, Dad.

why is this even a holiday?

dads fucking suck

We spent the whole day making pancakes to confuse the police. We went and bought a whole bunch of discount rattan furniture to throw them off. In the end two of the interns had a raging fistfight over a bottle of ativan (ironic, eh?) and passed out in eachother’s arms. Bobby Digital spray painted something about spreadable bacon, David M ran down the wrong street and missed the whole thing, and nobody knows where Drew went. Sean Orr was in a porta-pottie when it was tipped over and he’s been high on that blue fluid for about 48 hours now.

touchmyminaj:

does giving birth feel like pooping out your vagina????

ASKED BY A TRU DD